For the past few weeks,
I have restricted mobility or rather unrestricted immobility
(depending on how you look at it) and every day is a discovery for me
on the things I can do with one limb. Here is a motley compilation
Drive people nuts
When I ask people to
fetch drinking water, get the newspaper, switch on the wifi, switch
off the fan, switch on the AC, make a cup of tea, drive away the
mosquitoes – sometimes all at the same time you have set a new
benchmark for others on multitasking. First few instances, they so
filled with the “milk of human kindness” strive to fulfill my
every command. Emboldened by this kindness, when I repeat it
everyday , it dawned on me that I have discovered a new way of
driving people nuts!
Heightened sense of
hearing:
With just one limb you
can actually enhance your hearing. Hard to believe? It is simple,
when people see you lying down helplessly with one foot up in the air
(literally) they somehow assume, that you are either sleeping or
cannot hear. Just play along and you'll be privy to the juiciest of
gossips, updates on your exploits (unedited version), Even when they
speak on their cell phones or talk from another room – you still
hear every word crystal clear. Still not sure? then all I can say is
you have to first break your leg to find out
Set new fashion trends:
I love this one. With
most of your moment restricted to just sitting up or lying down all
in one place, your choice of wardrobe could be really innovative. I
tried out boxer shorts with bare chest or a combination of a t shirt
with what else boxer shorts again. You can also try the “pettai'
style Lungi for that “local' look. I must add that the lungi look
also goes very well with your unshaved and unkempt hair. To beat the
Chennai humidity and heat, nothing can replace the good old fashioned
“thundu' or cotton towel strategically spread across your legs.
Cool and casual all at once. One word of caution though: Beware of
wardrobe malfunctions
Be an Armchair
Philosopher
You will attain nirvana
just by watching people gasp at your pearls, nuggets and even buckets
of wisdom and psycho analysis that you deliver from your arm chair.
Never again will you get another opportunity to be whacky, wicked,
nasty and downright stupid – and people will still admire your
sagacity and profound thoughts. Over the days, I have become so good
at doling out doses of advise and summing up Life's essence in pithy
statements that I am seriously considering making it a full time
profession once my leg heals.
Make limping look easy
Whenever I get up or
rather limp out of my bed and continue limping away to my next
destination – usually the loo or the couch in the living room,
people encourage and exolt so much that soon I will be setting new
records in limping or breaking new ones (including my other limb)
Just don't tell my physio therapist
Watch Boring Tele
Serials
When you are down to
the last leg (literally) one thing which you have absolutely no
control over is the Remote Control. It has been taken away from me
with a vengeance. Sometimes, the remote is placed tantalizingly close
yet so far that they seem to dare me to reach for it. As a
consequence, I have now got used to watching tele serials that are
shown in between mindless commercials. I even started looking forward
eagerly to the next episode of Saravanan Meenatchi.
Hello Prince,
ReplyDeleteLooks like you are into a once in a life time opportunity savoring every bit ... How is it progressing?.